The Talmud states, "Why is it that pagans are polluted? Because they weren't present at Mt. Sinai. That moment when the snake tempted Eve, pollution was deposited within her. When Israel stood at Sinai the pollution ceased, but the pagans who weren't present at Sinai continue to be polluted." The number of issues raised by this quote could keep us busy for years, but I want to concern myself with one problem only. What happened during the epiphany at Sinai to cleanse us from whatever contamination Eve contracted?

To help us understand the problem I would like to bring the opinion of the Nefesh haChayim, Reb Chayim Volozhin, about what happened to Adam and Eve, and what got restored at Mt. Sinai. From the Talmud's version of the story it sounds as if something got added to our primordial parents and removed at the giving of the Torah. Reb Chayim expresses it differently. According to him, man was created with many interconnecting layers. The uppermost layer, called 'soul' (neshama) connects directly to the divine level where Hashem Himself resides. This connection was severed by the original sin. At Sinai we got reconnected. Now we can focus on one point. What about the Sinaitic experience reestablished our contiguity with Hashem?

The Pri Zadik, Reb Zaddok of Lublin, puts forward the idea that it's Torah study itself which keeps us in contact with the Creator. He interprets our statement as if man was impregnated with the evil inclination (yetzer hara). He then quotes the famous dictum from Kiddushin (30a), "If you are accosted by the disgusting one, drag him into the study hall." This is great advice. We believe that Torah study is the antidote to the evils of our dark side. Nevertheless I believe we must look elsewhere for the solution to our problem. As attractive as this idea is to exhort people to more Torah study, it seems that the sources point to something happening specifically at the Sinai event. The Ohr Gedalyahu, Reb Gedalya Shorr, makes this point about the experience of Sinai, outside the Torah itself, being significant. His proof text is cute. In the Haggadah, we sing "even if He brought us close to Sinai and didn't give us the Torah, it would have been enough for us." Rav Shorr clarifies by stating explicitly that just the proximity to Sinai purified us from the pollution. We must continue the search.

There are other proposals that the phenomena of Sinai were so overwhelming as to bring a sensory overload. The resulting mass prophetic experience (or if you prefer mass hysteria or hypnosis) brought an awareness of Hashem that forever changed our perception of Him. This is why the verse says that they saw the thunder. Our senses were not functioning normally. This kind of paranormal experience I'll leave to George Lucas. I object to these approaches for two reasons. Firstly, in the words of the Maor v'Shemesh, Reb Kalman Klonymus HaLevy Epstein, these special affects were not involved with "the purpose of fulfilling us," rather our completion was an internal circumstance. The pyrotechnics repelled us, the uniqueness of Sinai drew us in. Our rendezvous with the Divine shut out the world in our cleaving to the Almighty. During the height of the event we heard and saw nothing. (This happens sometimes during our prayers. On Yom Ha'azmaut, during ma'ariv at the yeshiva there were fireworks at a nearby settlement. After ma'ariv someone asked me what I thought of them. I responded innocently, "What fireworks?") Focus on Hashem allows no competition.

The other reason I disavow a science fiction version of the incident at Sinai is subjective. I want an experience we can, in some feeble way, recreate. When we relive that occasion every year on Shavuot we want to capture at least a smidgen of the event. We relive the exodus at Pesach, the desert sojourn at Sukkot, why not the epiphany at Shavuot? We can't attempt to relive what we can't at all grasp. There must be a pale way to reenact Sinai. For that we need an imaginable scenario. Our search for the essence of the experience must continue.

I want to posit two approaches, and later try to merge them. The first idea comes from the Maor v'Shemesh. Rav Epstein suggests that the catalyst for the revelation was the unity of the Jewish nation. The midrash records that the Jews encamped with one heart, and Rashi explains this was "in love and fraternity." At that instant Hashem appeared to them as an old man full of mercy and love. Divine influence rained down upon them, and repaired their spiritual deficiencies. This was the renewal or tikun required since the original sin. Original lust was replaced with altruism and selfless love. That emotional outpouring made the spiritual space within us for Hashem to enter our being. That was the revelation.

The S'fat Emet, Reb Yehuda Leib Alter of Gur, explains that an inner awareness occurred. The souls of everyone present at Sinai realized two items. One, that each soul was a portion of the Divine, and, two, that Hashem was present. That throughout their lives they were garbed in the natural realm, but at this instant they sensed a greater reality. Each looked inside themselves and saw the inner truth of themselves and the world. Nature is just a veneer obscuring the actuality below. At that special time and place there was a subtle slipping off of the veil, and all saw directly into the truth below. That the spirituality emanating from Hashem is the 'real world' and our physical realm is the ersatz. That was the revelation.

How and why did this happen specifically there and then? Reb Nachman of Breslav says that the awe of Hashem reached a critical mass within our souls to develop an awareness of Him and one another that, in turn, generated humility. This humility was mirrored by Hashem in a reciprocal shrinking (tsimtsum) that precipitated the rendezvous. The miniature Divine Presence entered the vacuum left by our departed ego. Hashem inspired us throughout the exodus experience, and finally this mass happening resulted. But, Reb Nachman asserts, we spawned it. Hashem hovered over us since the beginning of the plagues, but only made Himself manifest when we provided the right environment.

What did we see? We saw our relationship within the nation and to Hashem. Those are the major teachings of Torah. When our eyes opened we knew where we belonged in the scheme of things; we assumed our rightful place. We became reconnected. What had been lost was regained. The triangle of me relating to God, to another, and to myself was realigned.

There's a story in Masechet Shabbat (88b): The angels say, "What is this son of woman (Moshe) doing here (in heaven)? What right does he have to take the Torah?" Hashem turns to Moshe and says, "Take hold of my throne and return them a response." Rav Shorr explains the word for "response" is t'shuva, or repentance. The Torah belongs to us because we repent. We hold the throne through repentance. The repentance is regaining our proper space. It is all one manifestation. We are floundering, Hashem inspires us, we open our eyes to the glory of our destiny and relation to Him, we are reattached to the matrix of the cosmos, and the Torah is ours. It didn't need fireworks; our souls knew the path.

The veil maybe gossamer, but the world camouflages it well. This is our challenge every Shavuot. We must peer through the mask and see the real. It's not easy, but that's the assignment. It's not reliving the exodus, the splitting of the sea, or the wonders of the desert. It's not the magnitude of the miracle. It is the reacquaintance with the quiet voice inside us.

Chag Sameach

Respond to Rabbi Walk at rwalk@yhol.org.il

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